Tips for Planning a Same-Sex Wedding

Thirteen years of covering weddings has taught me one thing: no two love stories are the same, and that’s what makes them spectacular. Same-sex weddings, in particular, have this beautiful energy—there’s a sense of defiance, celebration, and pure joy in every detail. But, like any wedding, planning one comes with its own set of challenges (and let’s be real, potential family drama). Here’s what I’ve learned from watching hundreds of couples tie the knot in ways that honor who they are.

1. Forget the “Rules” and Make Your Own

Traditional weddings often come with rigid expectations—who walks down the aisle, who says the vows first, who wears what. The best part of a same-sex wedding? You’re not bound by those traditions unless you want to be. I’ve seen two brides walk down the aisle hand in hand, two grooms flip a coin to decide who speaks first, and a couple who danced their way into Lady Gaga’s “Stupid Love.” Do what feels right.

2. Be Thoughtful About Vendors

I wish I could say every vendor is LGBTQ+ friendly, but we’re not quite there yet. One couple I worked with had a florist suddenly back out after realizing it was a same-sex wedding. Awful, right? The silver lining: they found a queer-owned flower shop that created an even more stunning arrangement. Do your research, ask direct questions, and look for vendors who proudly display inclusivity on their websites. A good starting point is Equally Wed for LGBTQ+ wedding vendor directories.

3. Family Reactions: Hope for the Best, Prepare for the Worst

Most families are supportive, but let’s not sugarcoat it—some aren’t. I’ve seen couples heartbroken when certain relatives refused to attend, and I’ve seen others who built a family of friends that made the day even more special. Set boundaries, communicate clearly, and focus on the people who are there. Love isn’t about appeasing everyone; it’s about celebrating those who show up for you.

4. Navigating Legalities

Thankfully, same-sex marriage is legally recognized in many countries, but requirements vary. Some places still have outdated paperwork that doesn’t reflect non-traditional couples (seriously, it’s 2025—why is “bride and groom” still a default?). Double-check marriage license requirements in your area through the U.S. government website or your country’s equivalent.

5. Representation Matters in Every Detail

From wedding party terminology (ditch “bridesmaids” and “groomsmen” if it doesn’t fit) to your officiant’s wording, small details matter. I once attended a ceremony where the officiant used gender-neutral vows, and you could feel the guests exhale—like, finally, someone gets it. Speak up about what language feels right for you and your partner.

Tips for Planning a Wedding in August

August weddings? Gorgeous. Also? HOT. I’ve covered enough summer weddings to know that while the golden hour photos are dreamy, the heat can turn your big day into a sweaty mess if you’re not prepared. Let’s talk about how to make an August wedding work for you.

1. Timing is Everything

I once attended an August wedding where the ceremony was at noon in an open field. It was beautiful—until guests started melting like candles on an overheated cake. If you’re planning a wedding in August, consider a later start time. Aim for a late afternoon or early evening ceremony to avoid the worst of the heat.

2. Venue Matters More Than You Think

Outdoor weddings in August can be spectacular, but make sure there’s shade, fans, or—better yet—air conditioning nearby. Barns, vineyards, and beachfront settings are stunning, but without proper airflow, your guests will spend the night fanning themselves with menus. Look for venues with indoor-outdoor options so people can escape the heat when needed.

3. Dress for the Season

Heavy fabrics and long sleeves? Not ideal unless you want to experience heatstroke firsthand. Choose breathable fabrics like linen, chiffon, or lightweight silk. I once saw a groom nearly pass out in a three-piece wool suit—it looked amazing in photos, but I guarantee he regretted it. Stay cool and comfortable.

4. Hydration and Cooling Stations Are Non-Negotiable

A self-serve hydration station with fruit-infused water is a lifesaver. Bonus points for adding chilled towels or handheld fans. One wedding I covered had a “Cool Down Bar” with iced drinks, cold compresses, and mini spritzers. Genius.

5. Food and Drinks Need a Summer Strategy

Skip the heavy meals. Think fresh, light, and seasonal—grilled fish, summer salads, and fruit-based desserts. And for drinks? Boozy popsicles. Yes, they exist. A couple I worked with served frozen rosé popsicles during cocktail hour, and guests loved them. Just remember that alcohol dehydrates, so balance it with non-alcoholic options.

6. Bug-Proof Your Reception

Warm weather means mosquitoes. I once spent an entire outdoor reception slapping my arms like I was doing an interpretive dance. Provide citronella candles, bug spray stations, or (if budget allows) hire a pest control service to treat the area beforehand.

7. Plan for Unexpected Weather

Summer storms can roll in fast. If you’re going for an outdoor wedding in August, have a backup plan. I’ve seen couples scramble last-minute to move everything inside because they assumed a sunny forecast meant smooth sailing. Tents, indoor spaces, and flexible vendors are your best bet.

Final Thoughts

Whether you’re planning a same-sex wedding or a wedding in August, the key is the same: make choices that feel right for you. Forget the “shoulds,” plan for the realities, and create a day that actually feels like a celebration—not a stress marathon. And if things go sideways? (Because, let’s be honest, something always does.) Just roll with it. At the end of the day, you’re marrying the person you love. That’s what really matters.